Latrine Duty!

The past week has not been a good one for me; I kind of got into a bit of trouble. I was pulling tower guard with Harry Potter, upon our relief we stopped by the porta potty. While Harry used the facilities I held the door open for him so we could have a conversation. Once Harry finished relieving himself he pulled a black Sharpie out of his pocket and wrote the following statement on the door. “Stupidity has officially become the norm”

The day prior, new operational procedures came down from higher and Potter was not thrilled about them. To tell you the truth I’m not happy about the new procedures either. So, in an act of defiance Potter decided that he would stick it to the man by defacing government property. I personally did not think his actions were such a big deal, due to the fact that every porta potty that I’ve ever used is full of graffiti. However, on this subject the Gunny and I did not see eye to eye. 

You see the Gunny has the prostate of an eighty year old man. He goes at least once or twice an hour.

Now, the particular porta potty that old Harry wrote in was already covered with graffiti. I guess the old man had already read everything in that porta potty, which is how he knew that Harry’s writing, was fresh.

It did not take long for Gunny’s henchman Big Red to figure out that Potter and I were the culprits. Apparently; Potter was the only guy in the platoon to be carrying a black Sharpie in his pocket that day.

Once, the inquisition was complete we were told to report to Gunny to receive our punishments. On the way to the Gunny I asked Potter why he did not ditch the Sharpie, he told me to shut my mouth and mind my business.

Our punishment was both tedious and humiliating; it was broken down into two parts. The first part was what I was expecting, but with a twist. The twist involved the paint. The only paint located at the ECP was spray paint and we both knew we were not going to get off that easy. So, the Gunny took the cap off the can and proceeded to fill it with spray paint. We were given the paint filled cap and the smallest brush you could imagine and were told to paint over the graffiti on not just the porta potty in question but on all five of the porta potties located in our area of operation. The only catch was that we were not to paint over Harry Potter’s words. Why? I can’t say for sure. We had to return to the boss at least 11 times for pant refills, the job took us six hours to complete.  

The second part of the punishment was worse than the first. We had to stand in front of the bathroom area in tent city (where we live) for 3 hours, 3 nights in a row, wearing full kit. We were instructed to say the following words to every individual that wished to use the restrooms. “My name is SPC Potter/ PVT Gear Bear. Stupidity has officially become the norm; please do not write on the latrine walls.”

Gunny has told me several times since the incident that if it ever happens again I will be one sorry bear. Technically speaking I did not write anything I just held the door!


g/b